Dear Wal-Mart, It's Over.

Dear Wal-Mart,

It’s over.

The relationship has been strained for about 5 years now, but I’m calling it quits. In June 2007 I began a boycott of Wal-Mart that lasted almost an entire year…I literally did not set foot inside Wal-Mart during that time, which is more difficult than you might think. But I began shopping there again shortly after Ella was born because we had to tighten up the budget and, as much as I hated to admit it, it was cheaper than other grocery stores. I even remember the details surrounding our last “break-up.” It was a couple of days after two of our good friends, Nic and Toni, got married (and a couple of days before I found out I was pregnant with Ella!) and I went to Wal-Mart on my lunch break to get pictures developed. I went back after work to pick them up. Those were the two worst customer service experiences I’ve ever had. Until Friday night.

I hate taking my children with me to the grocery store. Don’t get me wrong, they are very, very good in public. I’m very lucky. However, I only like to go to the grocery store twice a month, so obviously those are two big trips, and with Kendall sitting in the front and Ella in the back that takes away a lot of cart space. Ella could walk, but then my grocery trip would be a couple of hours longer and a lot more frustrating. So I end up going to the grocery store whenever Ronnie is home and can watch the girls. This often ends up being late at night. On Friday night I got the girls in bed and left the house at 9 p.m. Ronnie wasn’t quite home from work yet but Ross was here. I did some browsing outside of the grocery section so I wasn’t actually ready to check out until about 10:45 p.m. And so the fun begins…

I pushed my extremely heavy, overstuffed cart to the front of the store to find that no checkout lanes were open. My blood pressure began to rise. Since I’m a frequent late shopper I know that they usually have only one checkout lane open this late and since it’s so late it’s not usually busy, I might have to wait briefly behind one person. So tonight there are about 12 self checkout lanes open and no regular lanes…but wait I see a lane open!! Thank goodness! I head that direction, only to notice a sign that says “20 items or less.” No way. Then I spot two employees at checkout lanes right next to each other. Yay! They’re about to open and I’ll be the first one! As I get closer I realize that they are counting money. I usually don’t say anything in situations like this and go with the flow, but I wasn’t about to self-check $200+ worth of groceries. I will abandon my cart and leave before that happens. So, blood pressure still rising, I walk up to the two ladies, one who appears to be a manager.

“Hi, ummm, are you all about to open one of these lanes?”
“No, but all the self check outs are open and lane #14 is open.”
I push my cart forward a little so she can see it, blood pressure continues to rise, my heart is pounding and my face is getting hot…
“So I’m going to have to self check out ALL of these groceries?”
“No, lane #14 is open.” She points as if I am blind to the light on lane #14. “It’s the cigarette line.
Fantastic.
"Yes, I can see that, but there is a sign that says ’20 items or less’.”
“That’s ok.”
“So if I go over there they will still check me out even though I have more than 20 items.”
“Yes.”

So to lane 14 I go - the cigarette lane.

I got in line behind two or three other customers waiting to go through the cigarette line when I see the manager go to the lady working the customer service desk and ask her to open up a lane. THANKS A LOT!!!!

She reluctantly opens a lane, after complaining about how busy she is, and I told the couple in front of me to go ahead and then I got behind them. I was frustrated, but glad to be in line. I don’t mind self checking out at all. If I have only a few items I always use the self check out. But I still feel that it is completely rude to have no lanes open. As part of their service to their customers they should scan and bag everyone’s groceries if they want them to. Oh wait, I forgot the cigarette lane was open, with its false advertisement of ’20 items or less’.

So then it’s my turn. I get a little stressed out unloading groceries onto the belt. I have a system and anyone who’s ever been grocery shopping with me makes fun of me, but I have a system. Produce first, followed by frozen foods, followed by refrigerated foods, followed by boxed items, followed by cans, followed by drinks, etc. Make fun if you want, it’s just how I do things. I didn’t have an opportunity to unload while the people in front of me were paying because they didn’t scoot up far enough, so I was in a hurry. I had about 1/3 of my cart unloaded and was frantically trying to hurry when the unthinkable happened. Two kids, probably late teens, got in line behind me and put their stuff on the cart. I paused, unsure of what was happening. The lady pushed the belt button, the belt moved, so then it was my stuff, separator, their stuff, large empty space. What the heck?! The lady took off a few things to scan, and I replaced them with a few things, thinking eventually the kids behind me would notice what they were doing. Nothing. This continued for a couple of minutes. I was breathing as slowly and as deeply as possible, trying to hide the fire that must have been coming out of my ears. I realized that the guy behind me had talked to me in the produce section. He was asking me about apples. Seemed like a nice guy, wouldn’t expect him to be a rude conveyor belt hog. Though this reminded me of another way Wal-Mart had annoyed me that night. The produce section was really bad. Ella specifically asked for apples. They only had about 15 gala apples out and I picked the only 4 that weren’t bruised. So instead of saying, "Are you a moron? You can't put your groceries on the belt until I'm finished! I was here first! Go take your Coca-Cola to the self check out line or the cigarette line!" I politely said, “Do you mind pushing your stuff down so I can finish unloading my cart? “Oh yeah!! Sorry!” he says as if he had no idea what he did. Figured. So I unload groceries. I was annoyed because he didn’t completely take his stuff off the belt. I clearly could fill up that belt another time or two with all the stuff I had left in my cart. Check out lady pushes the button, belt moves, we are in the same predicament. I was stunned. I had to ask AGAIN for him to move his crap. He laughed again. I contemplated punching him in the face but decided against it. This seriously goes on about 4 more times until I am finally finished unloading my cart and my groceries are literally piled on top of one another. So much for my neat, organized system. I couldn’t even see straight. $217. That just makes my trip even more fantastic!!

So I pushed my insanely heavy overflowing cart toward the doors and I pick up my phone to call Ronnie and tell him why I’m NOT getting a movie from Redbox. The nice older man at the doors says, “Bye, have a good night!” I managed to smile and tell him to have a nice night. He seemed like a really nice guy and I felt sad that he was working for such an incompetent corporation that I would never, ever support again. Then as I push my cart through the doors three high school boys come barreling in through the “out” door and I had to push my heavy cart over to keep from hitting one of them. “OH MY GOSH!!” I finally yell. I was so mad that I was about to cry, because that’s what I do when I get really, really mad. And then all I could think about was how I wish I hadn’t moved my cart so I would have hit one of those kids right in the kneecaps. Ronnie picks up at that time and I just yell, “I’m not getting a movie, and I’m NEVER COMING HERE AGAIN!!”

I realize that very little of my problems Friday night are directly related to Wal-Mart…just the idiots who happened to be there when I did. But still, this seems to be the only store where I have these types of problems. So I’m done. While I still feel like I spend less money when I shop at Wal-Mart, that will just be a sacrifice that we have to make. And now I need to find a new, cheap brand of diapers for Kendall, because I unfortunately had become a big fan of the Wal-Mart brand. Then again, if I ONLY bought diapers there it would give us an opportunity to poop on Wal-Mart.